i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Decided in my tanked state last night purchase 2 weeks worth of xanax, so I can guess my way thru this week and finals. Soberly, I decided it would be a great way to test my knowledge of finance.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize
