Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
Randomize
