Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
We should go, because after those margaritas time is running out on my sobriety clock.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
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