OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
A lady just asked me if you "seat yourselves" here at qdoba. I told her yea and she has been sitting at a table waiting for someone to take her order for 25 mins.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
There is a homeless man handing out free beer on the city bus. He has a cooler and everything. I love this trashy yet generous city.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
So, just saw a lady hysterically sobbing in a Walmart at 3 AM. Someone's not having a happy mother's day.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
He complimented the perfect handprints you left on each of my ass cheeks.Thanks.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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