It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
Randomize
