My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
You coming out tonight? We gotta hang out before I move to Madison. BTW I'm moving to Madison.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept telling me to "raw dog" your take home breathalyzer without the mouthpiece
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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