well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
Last night I dressed up as a cowgirl and walked into McDonald's. I bought 20 mcribs. There's pictures
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
I'm just saying, I walked in on you blowing a burrito. I now understand how obsessed you are with Taco Bell. And how long it's been since you've got some.
He gave me an extra phone charger for the other side of the bed the other night. Is that love?
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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