Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
