So I'm playing pool in my cowboy boots and some guy came up looks at my boots and goes, "you should've got the boots with the fur"
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
she found out just an hour ago that she might have cervical cancer. either way we're watching 50/50 and taking a shot of patron anytime anyone says cancer.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
