she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He wouldn't let me go down on him. He stopped me and told me he was a giver.
She handed me her tooth and asked me to hold it so she could swim.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
I'm gonna tell the medical examiner that your cause of death was over-arousal.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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