i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
I came home in someone else's underwear this morning
Atleast you got a souvenir
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
Randomize
