If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
Do you need to be saved?
No I think I'm God
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
