i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
But can mardi gras accurately capture the essence of my tiny rage?
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
We damn well better have a snow day tomorrow. We just broke out the rum.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
test was negative. but nancy drew has yet to solve the case of the missing period.
Randomize
