I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I lost a little respect for your boyfriend when I learned that he has a scar from a Cheerio.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
One day i'll wow you with artfully trimmed pubes.
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
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