His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Apparently I repeatedly thanked the paramedic for saving the "happy new year" beads i was wearing. that bad.
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