I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
One of two things would happen: He'd love it, or you'd get a restraining order.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
One less thong to worry about.
One less *thing! But probably that too.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
