yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
FACT: You were laying down on top the bar letting randoms do bodyshots off you until someone told theyre friend "its time to roll, i wanna hit another bar" and you literally rolled your self right off the bar. have fun explaining your bruises tomorrow
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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