that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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