Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
We're at that point in our relationship where sweatpants sex has become acceptable...
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
the chips you spilled whiskey on is not the same thing as Irish breakfast potatoes
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
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