Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
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