we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
i knew it was time to break up with him once he pulled out the Halo foreplay costumes
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
You straight up wore me out. This should be a proud moment for you. It's almost like my penis is asking for a timeout. But not really
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize
