She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
And everyone was looking at me because it was cold and I was drunk and may have screamed "oh fuck" ... You know what, fuck that. What do people think they're getting at Denny's 2 in the morning
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
wtf why is there glitter all over my dog
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
I think my moral compass just broke
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
