Texts From Last Night

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  (847): View more from Illinois

  just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity

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  (847): just tell him he has love handles, he'll die of insecurity http://tfl.nu/hbyg
  Replies (7) Good night (1576) Bad night (1886)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I think my vagina is haunted

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  (608): I think my vagina is haunted http://tfl.nu/mic0
  Replies (26) Good night (940) Bad night (3303)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.

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  (231): I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out. http://tfl.nu/21gu
  Replies (12) Good night (3793) Bad night (1164)
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"

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  (608): and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM" http://tfl.nu/3pco
  Replies (26) Good night (1701) Bad night (7451)
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  (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week

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  (780): girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week http://tfl.nu/5wm5
  Replies (32) Good night (6714) Bad night (1154)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes

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  (860): there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes http://tfl.nu/0fsj
  Replies (24) Good night (5030) Bad night (2556)
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  (907): View more from Alaska

  You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.

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  (907): You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink. http://tfl.nu/mebb
  Replies (29) Good night (4438) Bad night (1140)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.

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  (201): Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it. http://tfl.nu/ciee
  Replies (10) Good night (2131) Bad night (710)
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  (970): View more from Colorado

  You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.

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  (970): You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan. http://tfl.nu/do61
  Replies (14) Good night (1996) Bad night (562)
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  (587): View more from Alberta

  You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.

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  (587): You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month. http://tfl.nu/i8z5
  Replies (16) Good night (2141) Bad night (784)
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  (419): View more from Ohio

  you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there

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  (419): you ate the make a wish sign. Like actually chewed on it. It was our solution to going outside when the cops were there http://tfl.nu/8eig
  Replies (0) Good night (374) Bad night (546)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.

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  (860): I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love. http://tfl.nu/zgl1
  Replies (3) Good night (609) Bad night (442)
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  (660): View more from Missouri

  You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?

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  (660): You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that? http://tfl.nu/jtqu
  Replies (5) Good night (705) Bad night (1150)
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  (231): View more from Michigan

  She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.

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  (231): She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis. http://tfl.nu/zwdy
  Replies (7) Good night (444) Bad night (605)
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  (858): View more from California

  Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.

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  (858): Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke. http://tfl.nu/9t6d
  Replies (2) Good night (628) Bad night (303)

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