I'm drive I can fine osifer
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
You asked the bartender if she was trying to get you drunk. She cut you off after that.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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