I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
You need 4-7 business day to recover from a fingering like that.
I'm in a bed full of sand, and also just took my contacts out. Whatever happened yesterday was great, I think.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
