Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Does it get any better than dating a guy with a vasectomy? The answer is NO. No it does not
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
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