My friend's 9-year-old son just informed me that for a cop station, you can't use a shotgun; you have to use a machine gun. Thank you, Grand Theft Auto, for single-handedly corrupting our youth.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
he's not even weird he's been offering me different drinks all night
oh i remember now hes the guy that liked when i peed on him
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