i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
