I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
jersey shore drinking game rules must be edited. almost died. how is it possible for a person to say guido that many times
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
ten seconds after he was done making out with the blonde, he rips off his jacket and screamed "Goddamn it, you know I like brunettes"
I have never seen someone so pissed at getting some. i called dibs so fuck him
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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