ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
I woke up this morning in a strange bed with a kid with an accent playing with my feet.
Define "chronic" masturbator.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
This is not a drunk text right now. This is an i want your dick text. There is a difference.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
What are you doing and how can I add sex in there
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
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