Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
It was perfect I came I passed out in his comfortable bed then a glass of jack Daniels fell from the bed post and spilled all over my face
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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