I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
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