I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
I'm too drunk to explain this to you. It's too hard.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
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