Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i realized my work ethic and productivity really improves if i masturbate on my lunch break.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
why would you automatically assume i'm high...
you just told me you're eating the powder of a lemonade mix.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
That's not fair! You can't come over after you just had sex and rub my dry spell in my face!
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Randomize
