All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I have officially tracked lube all over our house on the bottom of my socks without knowing it. Don't slip when you come in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
Your dick is going to fall off. Be careful or you'll get callouses. A workingman's dick.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
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