Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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