And he just showed me his vera bradley wallet...
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Dude, she looked like the Canadian Slam Poet, neck hair and all.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
Everytime I try to keep track of the amount of people I slept with I always forget about that guy I met on the dc metro, where I woke up to him organizing his Special K and Molly and I was covered in sleeping cats.
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
