There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
he just told me about his fetish for rubbing grape jelly on his penis.
He went soft
Wait. During?
Yeah, he was IN. MY. MOUTH.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Is there a word for someone who only has sex with NFL prospects?
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I DON'T EVEN KNOW ONE MINUTE IM SITTING HER THE NEXT IM FLYING PASSED THE MOON
PISSING MYSELF IN ZERO GRAVITY
THOSE AIN'T STARS U SEE TONIGHT GURL
Well I mean enduring a 45 minute conversation about C-sections was worth the 9 jello shots those soccer moms gave me.
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
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