So my grandma sent me a doily for my birthday - don't ask why, I don't know. Anyways I put my bong on it, I think it actually classed up the joint.
Just cropdusted the office
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just threw up during my phone interview for the largest PR firm in the world.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, I only wore tennis shoes under the gown. Way cooler than khakis and a shirt, but much more awkward when my parents wanted to go to dinner immediately after the ceremony and my grandmother started to unzip the gown. Stopped her before it was too late, but barely. My dad just rolled his eyes.
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
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