I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
so, my congressman just called me to say he has office hours this week if i'm still interested in talking to him. i pray to god this is not related to Friday.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
There is no way I'm taking advice from somone who's idea of a balanced diet consists of vodka and lemon detox juice
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
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