Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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