Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
