I accidentally had phone sex last night
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Just bored and untired. I want to be in Austin. At college. Drinking someone elses alcohol. Am I asking too much of life?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
It's probably just the physical manifestation of slut karma. But i of course mean that in the kindest way possible because i love you and respect your choices
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
only thing in my fruit bowl is 4 champagne corks and a jenga piece . Tuesday.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Im breaking out the trunk vodka tonight, its been aged to perfection.
I see you met someone special
Why did you load my phone up with pics of Al Gore?
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Friends don't let friends go vibrator shopping alone.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.