I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize
