Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Randomize
