You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
