I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
Well my door is unlocked for you, I'll be in the bathtub drinking a pre-mixed bottle of margarita until I forget the degree to which my life sucks.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
i need to stop establishing animals as safe words. Giraffe and Penguin are really awkward words to say during sex
Surprise court date day!!! Wake the fuck up!
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
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