she's leaving w me bro, I've been buying her mad shots. She's seen my apt. So locked down.
Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i'm unexpectedly in a limo, eating poutine. the driver just offered me coke. good idea?
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
I think this conversation is over.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
Confessions From 23 People Who Have Been Hiding Terrible Secrets
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed