Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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