i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
does the girl puking in my garbage belong to you?
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
